I staked myself out by the front door. Having recently joined the Modern World, I hooked my portable computing device up to a big speaker, watched Monday Night Football and enjoyed some overproof Cutty Sark.
Soon the children arrived, their parents a few paces away watching for apples embedded with razor blades. One parent came right up to the fucking door and passed me some evangelical bullshit.
No one wastes more paper than fucking Christians.
None of the children wore costumes that would offend shit.