30 November 2014
Rough Sex in Cold Canada
Outside the mall people are fucking freaking out.
"It's f-f-f-f-freezing out," they are saying to people rushing by them into the mall's warm womb.
It is like -5 Celsius.
The rest of Canada finds this uproariously funny.
"People from Dope City are such motherfucking pussies," they say between sips of bar rye and coke. Such statements are met with the same sort of universal agreement usually reserved for how bad the Leafs suck.
"Same motherfucking pussies the Canucks turn into come play-off time," someone who thinks they know more about hockey than Don Cherry will crack.
At least we do not beat our girlfriends silly and claim it is rough consensual sex.
No wonder Ottawa is raping us all the time. They think it is a consensual affair.