18 December 2011

Got It Made

Sonja thinks the cool towel sculptures our maid leaves us on our bed are half the fun of visiting Mexico. Swans, octopi, fish, beach bags - the maid can make them all. Our tips are included in the all inclusive packages we buy but Sonja makes sure the maid gets tipped extra every day. The maid is working class, just like us, and needs every peso she can get.

(We would prefer not to go all-inclusive, and did so before Sonja stopped eating the dead, but our hotel offers a wide variety of vegetarian food for her to graze upon. Once you get away from Dope City eating veggie can get pretty boring in restaurants.)   

One morning, after the maid had cleaned up after us after we had some wild drunken sex and absent mindedly left some of our wild drunken sex gear under the covers before we went out for the day we found the maid had sculpted us a giant cock and balls for us instead of a bird or something. I later saw the maid in the hall where she gave me the you dirty old fucker look women have been giving me all my life.

Next morning, after Sonja had preceded me downstairs to get her cup of tea, I left a condom between the giant towel balls of the sculpture just to see what the maid would do with it. She kept it and now she is giving me the you dirty old fucker look worse than ever.

Having a maid is the coolest thing a couple can have even if it is only for a couple weeks a year. Too bad, as we all know, life is not like the Brady Bunch. We have to make our own beds.  

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