17 November 2010
Just Sit, Get Paid
"How come Campbell still in Victoria White House?" Ma asked me as she poured me the second cup of coffee my naturopath does not want me to drink this morning. She did not wait for my answer before she continued. "I know. I know. Not White House. Always whites in charge in this province. Except Dosanjh. One Hindoo, big deal. Campbell quit. Just about cry on tv. Then stay like bad cancer cannot be cured. Now he hiding in White House like he waiting for bill collector. Peeking out curtain. Not answering phone."
I poured the 18% cream I am not supposed to put into my coffee while I thought about it. "He wants to pretend he has done nothing wrong. He is hoping if he makes it look like he has not been run out of office for fucking everybody but his rich pals up the ass that history will be kind to him. All the right wing motherfuckers have the same dream. They want to be looked back on kindly the way America looks back on Ronald Reagan; the way skinheads look back on Margaret Thatcher; the way the hippies look back on Ghandi."
Ma shook her head. "Maybe I quit too. Just sit here get paid by everybody. What is the word for people who just sit, get paid?"
I knew the word. "The word is dogfucker."
"That right. Campbell fuck dog. Fuck it good." She made the fuck motion with her hips.
I barked, "Ow-woo!"