27 January 2010

My Brush With Red Hot Skin Tight Olympians

My town is only going to be brushed with the Power and the Glory of the 2010 Winter Olympic Wing-Ding so I am making sure not to miss one motherfucking thing. After work today I swung by the Rec Centre to check out the Japanese speed skating team. They have the rink booked for a week or two before the Russian skating team takes over the rink just before the Games begin.

They were practicing when I got there; swooping around the big white rink the way they swooped around Pearl Harbour back in '41. It was the closest I have ever been to an Olympic athlete since I may (or may not have) passed Ross Rebagliati a bomber at that party in Whistler that really put Dope City weed on the map. There was no security present that would have prevented me, or anyone else holding an irrational grudge against the Japanese, say the Flint, Michigan Liberation Army, from causing all sorts of trouble.

But I was not there to drink beer and raise shit like my old buddy Steve Fonyo. I was there to witness the grace of world class skaters. The Japanese women were particularly graceful. They were damn near as sexy as roller derby girls, swooping around the rink in their skin tight suits. I was brushed by their skin tight power and glory.

No one else around here may be getting excited about the Olympics but I sure am. Bring on the sexy Russian women in their skin tight suits!

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