Bigger and Bigger and Bigger

Sonja came home from a friend's house with news.

"They have a bigger tv than us."

Fuck. Soon enough we were in a tv store.

"Is that the biggest one you have?" Sonja asked the clerk.

It was. We went to a bigger tv store, the biggest tv store in town.

Sonja's eyes sparkled like a little girl having a pony with pink bows tied to its bridle paraded before her on her birthday. She pulled out her phone before a clerk had time to approach us and begin his sales pitch.

"How big exactly is your tv again?"

When she hung up Sonja informed me the tv on the wall was even bigger than her friend's. I fucking hope so, I thought. The tv on the wall was bigger than the side of a semi trailer. If human progress can be measured by the size of our televisions, we have come a long way motherfuckers.

Took me all day to put together the stand and reassemble and add to the various components that make up my stereo. Made me miss the roller derby on Sunday.

"Motherfucking tvs," I had cursed many times as I fumbled with wrenches, screwdrivers and enough wires to light up every town in Manitoba except Winnipeg. Yet the effort was all made worthwhile when I turned everything on and lit up the living room like the sun lights up the moon. Sonja put her arms around me and congratulated me on my electronic know-how. Sometimes I think she forgets I can do other shit besides drink beer.

I looked at the screen, watching an actor portray young dumbfuck Don Cherry and thought about how cool it is going to be to have such a big tv when the World Cup begins in June.