18 September 2009

I Wish I was a Roller Girl

I wish I was girl
And I could roller skate
I'd kick Suzy Shameless'
Cherry-Popping cake

I wish I was a roller girl
I'd hit her fast and I'd hit her late
And when she begged to be hit no more
I'd make her booty quake

I wish I was in a roller girl movie
'Cause then I'd be a star
But I'm just sitting here
Getting high and drinking beer

Wishing I was a girl
(Sorry about that Jerry Jeff Walker.)


mollymew said...

Hey Beer,
Please don't forget to shave before you put on your skates. Or mayvbe don't. It'd be great for the intimidation factor. Holy Shit, it's Mrs Saskquatch. You know there seems to be something South African about this whole idea.

Anonymous said...

Shaving is not a prerequisite for joining rollerderby. Trust.


Nazz Nomad said...

here in nyc and lawn guyland, we have kick ass roller derby- do a search on gotham girls - my friends team is the Queens Of Pain:

ps- who do i have to blow to get linked on your site?

Mr. Beer N. Hockey said...

Nazzy - matter of fact I was thinking I ought to add your bleedin' blog to the Dope City sidebar. I am a little slow about such things but you can consider it done.

Just what I need: an excuse to pay a visit to the Queens of Pain with an extended stopover in their photo gallery.

RRR - TCRG are the finest groomed league in roller derby, maybe ever.

Mr. Beer N. Hockey said...

Molly - The athletic South African hermaphrodite sure set some wheels in motion. I'd be inclined to let him keep running against women. Now that everybody knows his gender status you only have to look at who the silver medalist is to know who the fastest non-hermaphrodite was. Chances are the fastest non-hermaphrodite has been injecting herself with shit that may just have her grow a set of male genitalia down the road to match my latest South African hero's.

mollymew said...

Yeah Beer,
I was just holding forth on this subject over a few drinks earlier this evening ie the "technical details" about hermaphrodite/intersex/chimera and their differences. One thing I kept repeating is that "there was no fault on him/her/it", unlike the girls/guys who inject themselves under the tongue to hide the needle marks. Without the medical attention given on the occasion of the race the chances of a black South African who wasn't part of the political ruling class of getting such diagnostics is far less than zero. I doubt with a great certainty that anyone within 50 clicks of the person in question had any idea of her/his condition or even today could describe it with any clinical accuracy. No fault on the athlete. I really do feel sorry for the poor bugger.
For what it is worth I think the record should stand, but that the IOC should make a ruling that there should be preliminary testing so that the next such situation (due sometime in the next 2540 years) would be averted.