15 March 2008

Iraq Pizza War


I think I have only ever met one Iraqi in my life. There are not a lot of Iraqis working in what is left of Dope City's sawmills.

The Iraqi I met owned one of the neighbourhood pizza joints back when I smoked a lot of joints and ate one fuck of a lot of pizza. Most of the pizza I ate was delivered by someone even more stoned than me who usually got smoked up even more before he headed back to work.

One time though Jimi and I were on our way home from the pub after drinking our usual too many when we stopped into the pizza joint to order food to Jimi's place on the condition the driver drove us with the pizza. Cheaper than a cab, motherfuckers.

I am a chatty fucker when I have had a few too many so I struck up a conversation with the owner. "So where the fuck are you from anyway?" After he told me where I asked, "Fucking hot there, eh?"

"Yes, but in the mountains where I lived we often had snow in the winter."

"Bullshit," I told him.

"No bullshit," he told me.

Jimi asked, "Did you play hockey up in those snowy fucking mountains?"

The Iraqi laughed, "We did not play hockey. But if we did we would have had a better team than the Canucks."

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