Christmas Message To the World

I have been working the same job at the sawmill for just about two decades. No one is going to get my job until I die. The job allows me to load up the guy next to me in the production order with more work than he can handle. The mill finds it difficult to fill the position sometimes because everybody knows I like to load up the fucker with work whenever possible and lean back in my chair and think about grocery lists, what I might write about, who my family should kill this year, whatever. The guy who works down the line from me is known as Beer's Bitch.

Today I knew my bitch was going to be real hungover so I got my machine going as fast as it can manage without busting to bits as soon as the first whistle signaled us to make an effort we did not want to make.

My bitch was vomiting inside of fifteen minutes. Puked out his false teeth and everything. Merry Christmas, motherfucker.