21 June 2006
The Dope City Canucks have hired their new coach and everybody is scratching their itchy bits hoping if they scratch just the right spot they will think of something profound to say about the next curfew-happy motherfucker to try and do what only Frank Patrick has done before - win a Stanley Cup for the homeless and dope sick of our damn near sawmill-less town - not just dream about it.
I'm no expert (and I cannot remember anything after that cop's rubber bullet hit me in the head during the Riot of '94) but I think the tabernac they just hired is the first guy the team has promoted from their farm team. Give them credit for trying something new. After this guy the Canucks, if they have not changed their name that rhymes with sucks by then, ought to try a woman behind the bench. Think about it. By then they will have tried everything else.
What woman though? She would have to be Canadian as a first rate grow-op and able to get along with the Dope City Unfree Press as well as the Free one. I nominate Anne Murray. The nominations are closed.