At my mom's end of the year wing ding last night I discovered several of her now single friends have turned to computer dating services for assistance in meeting men. None have panned a gold nugget out of the river yet but they seem pleased to have not yet met an axe murderer. All have had to add information to their man traps about them not being cougars due to the willingness of young men to be their prey. "Lots of boys want to go out with me who are like just about old enough to be my grand-children," one said through her feline whiskers.
I remember when Christmas party chit chat was about hockey and snow tire sales. Now it is about dirty talk on the computer. My mom's friends spared me the precise details of their exchanges with men on their computers but I can just imagine how it sounds when the girls get together for lunch at the pub. "A 20 year old from Dope City wants me to stick a finger up his ass when he comes in my mouth!" "A 23 year old from Fort Royal wants to eat my shaved pussy with two of his potty mouthed buddies." "A 19 year old in Sliverville wants to have wheelchair sex with me in the bathroom at the racetrack while he videotapes us with his phone."
Recently Canada legalized group sex. Looks like 2006 is going to be a breakout year for us fans of beer, hockey and pillow talk. I'm going to put up a sign in the front yard on Friday nights that reads, "GROUP SEX HERE TONIGHT." My Christian neighbours can fuck off. But I hope my mom's friends don't hear about the sign, unless one of them wants some video wheelchair sex in the bathroom at the racetrack.
No comments:
Post a Comment