4 September 2016

How To Get A Free Tank of Gas In William's Lake

Sonja and I were in the bar. Wine and beer. Mediterranean sandwich. Shepherd's pie.

Near us a table were entertaining one another with tales of their travels though the mysteries of British Columbia's fuck rugged interior. Each tale topped the next until one, judged the finest, sent their conversation in another direction.

"Back in the mid-'70s, I guess it was, JJ and I were on our way from Kettle Falls, other side of the border from Trail, to William's Lake. Snowed like fuck the whole fucking way. Fuck did it snow. But we kept on driving because we had five kilos of coke that would all be sold to the good people of William's Lake before New Year's which was coming right up.

"At times we were driving through three feet of snow and it sure did slow us down. We did not get to William's Lake until midnight where we stopped for gas before checking into the nearby Fraser Hotel. After filling up we went into pay where we found two men swinging chains at the attendant demanding all his fucking money in their best Stampede voices.

"Good thing JJ had his peacemaker with him. When he pulled that motherfucker out on the thugs they could not drop their chains and shut the fuck up fast enough. JJ told them next time he saw them off-reserve he'd shoot them for fun. Got a free tank of gas for our troubles."

Everybody at the table laughed.

William's Lake is rougher than a bear fuck the table agreed.


Unknown said...

Good one Beer.

But the stories grow in the telling ...

I remember as a kid riding the gondola up the ski mountain, hubbub as it goes, just as we get to the top and everyone goes quiet, the two tall guys at the front, one talking one laughing, are finishing the punch line of the story being told all the way up, "Just when we started to really have fun the cops came and we got arrested. Ruined the whole thing."

Nobody in the car said a word, except me to myself "oh, having fun and getting arrested go in the same sentence." Oh dear, is this the world we live in.

My advice is to have fun and not get arrested, it can spoil your whole day.


Anonymous said...

Mr. Beer,

My main association with Williams Lake is having one of my younger brothers tell me back when we were both young about the Williams Lake Stampede, which he attended with his buddies for quite a few years. That was the primo piss-up of the North among connoisseurs of Stampede drunken excess. There were so many to choose from, including the Kispiox Rodeo, Smithers, Vanderhoof and Quesnel Stampedes. But the Williams Lake one was notoriously the best... it may be a little tamer now.