Lunchroom Feud

The Hindoos and the whites were in the middle of it when I walked through the sawmill lunch room door. The subject of the feud? Do Hindoos have the ugliest children? Such loud open feuds, held every couple of months, help the sawmill's two primary working class cultures blow off enough steam to prevent a lot more serious boil overs of our barely concealed murderous feelings for one another.

Rollie was doing most of the talking from the white side of the room; Pupinder represented the Punjabs.

"Your fucking kids are so fucking ugly they never get fucking kidnapped like fucking white kids do. No one wants to kidnap an ugly kid. Hell, even motherfucking Chinese kids get kidnapped once in a while. Name me one fucking Hindoo kid who has ever been kidnapped in Canada. Name me one."

The Hindoos, unable to think of a single example, huddled to form a response to Rollie's ugly point.

Pupinder spoke after their brief huddle broke up. He spoke with the manner of someone revealing a winning poker hand. "Our children are too smart to be kidnapped the way stupid white kids and stupid Chinese kids are."

Rollie threw up his hands in mock defeat. "Ok, you win. Your ugly kids probably do have to work extra hard developing their intelligence in the hope of one day getting married to someone not as ugly as they are."

The white guys in the room snickered. The Hindoos looked smug in victory. Everyone went back to work after lunch feeling good about themselves.