"If I'm wrong, I'm insane. If I'm right it's even worse." - line from the Stepford Wives which is on the television tonight because Jennifer Love Hewitt's show is a motherfucking repeat.
The Stepford Wives was on the television when I came home from the mountains with the Hammer. We had headed straight up into the clouds after work. It was snowing up in the mountains, snowing hard. I built a small fire and cooked weiners on a green stick over the hot coals. The Hammer likes hot dogs. I threw her weiners on a bed of snow she rolled in after she was done eating. She is a dog who cares about what she smells like. She does not know Hot Dogs Are Evil. I do, but I like to eat the Evil Hot Dog Meat.
The Hammer just gets the smokey cooked weiner. I put my weiner in a white bun prepared with Swedish mustard, Heinz ketchup and smoked gouda. I washed down my hot dog with Russell Cream Ale. The Hammer ran into the creek and slurped up some of the world's cleanest water.
I moved to where I live so I could do things like get into the mountains quick with my dogs. The city can go fuck itself.
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