19 June 2007

War and Apple Wine

...at the foot of a hedge of prickly pears, they found their comrade with his head back, bizarrely facing toward the moon. At first they did not recognize his head because of its strange shape. But it was very simple. His throat had been cut and that ghastly swelling in his mouth was his entire sexual organ. That was when they saw the body. With its legs spread wide, the Zouave's pantaloons slashed, and, in the middle of the gap, that swampy puddle, which they could see by the now indirect light of the moon. "Croak with it or without it, you're still dead," the sargeant said.

Albert Camus, The Last Man

While the weather was warm I bought a bottle of green apple wine I thought Sonja might like to sip on on a hot afternoon. I put it on the bottom shelf of the fridge behind the beer section of my favourite kitchen appliance. That bottle of wine sat there for quite some time because our weather became cool again. Yesterday Sonja had me open it. She tried to like it but she cannot drink anything but red wine any more. She said, "That's gross," and passed her glass to me. I will drink anything.

It is an attractive looking wine made by the Fort Wine Company. It is made near an old British fort from where the money grubbing Brits used to rip off the Indians in trade deals and spread small pox to as many of them as they could. Now that our fishing and forest industries are pretty much done for in these parts we are counting on companies like the Fort Wine Company to provide employment to those of who do not wish to work in the marijuana growing business.

It is a fine tasting wine too; very easy to drink. If you were planning on taking a good Christian girl for a picnic and a screw but you knew the screw would never happen unless your date had her bible learning erased from her memory by liquor I would suggest this wine. It is made for gulping. Oh yes, green apple wine is just the thing to feed a girl from a Christian college on a sunny Saturday afternoon.

3 comments:

Stephnie VAN said...

Oh Mr. Beer, you have got to try "Ephemere"- a slightly green apple-y beer brewed in Quebec.... tasty summer beer! Dry and beery, not at all like a cider (which generally taste like Jolly Ranchers to me).

Mr. Beer N. Hockey said...

It is the tips I have received about alcohol, especially beer, that makes the effort of 2 + 2 effortless. I will see if I can order a case or two of Ephemere. 2 + 2 is always happy to support the economy of the hash loving nation of Quebec.

Anonymous said...

and another thing.....

Suds...in a tulip shaped glass?

only in Quebec